Novos 3s get it Ryt On to make it 6 out of 6

Novos 3rds v Ryton 3rds – Saturday 7th February 2015
Official Match Report
Re-knowed throughout the civilised world as unquestionably the greatest side to play for in Social rugby history, the stupendously handsome and gorgeous Novocastrians development team made it six glorious wins in a row on Saturday with a rare but welcome appearance on the verdant velvet sward that is the big pitch at Sutherland Park.
This was only the second opportunity this season that the 3rds have had to entertain the balconies on the sacred turf where a strong Ryton squad journeyed north of the Tyne as visitors in what was expected to be a fiercely contested, do-or-die fixture in the crack NRFU River Blyth league.
In recent weeks the Novos 3rd team squad have all been in such increasingly high spirits that the Dear Leader, Kim Jong il Pratt II, is understood to have been interviewed under caution last Wednesday by the Northumbria Police narcotics squad following scurrilous rumors, put about by our jealous rivals, that he has been slipping an interesting blend of ecstasy and crack into the pre-match Ovaltine during the recent series of Saturday morning breakfast meet-ups that team spirit has demanded. However, Kim Jong was clearly unfazed by this minor inconvenience as he orchestrated and was at the center of several hundred increasingly giddy fb message posts during the preceding week. The general histrionic tone of nearly every one of these messages would have shamed a class of pre-menstrual13 year old school girls but such is the spirit and anxiety of this team to get out on the pitch and play for each other at the moment!
As is becoming usual, the selected side was confirmed within 4.5 seconds of being released and while being shorn through unavailability of some of big name rugby galacticos like Jack Salt and Greg Humphreys, it still contained a huge wealth of rugby talent that would have Stuart Lancaster drooling with delight if only the RFU coffers were deep enough to tempt any of us away from the rugby heaven that is life at Novos these days under Head-Coach Magnus Leask.
Many of the regular performers were still retained within the squad which was joined by Guy Douglas and JP along with the ever solid “Cliff” Paterson in a robust front row, promising new prospect Callum Hoy made his first start since impressing from the bench, and particularly on the social front, last week. The regular back row of Andy Gardiner, Kim Jong and Des picked itself once again. Further out, His Royal Highness King Christian of Selkirk was in at pivot to provide a dynamic link between the donkeys and the pretty boys, which obviously included the deadly duo of the dancing Marshall twins, John having made bail after an over-exuberant encounter with gentlemen from the local Constabulary after celebrating last week’s great win. There was a welcome and overdue return from publicans favorite Mark Hemming’s who separated the older and younger Wilsons in the center and on the bench the ancient, lumbering beast of a rhinoceros that is Damien Foggon was available for the first time in a good couple of months to supplement the pace, power and skill that were brought by the speedy Matt MacAuley, James Weaver (from his sick-bed), Tommy Burford and Matt Freeman. All in all, the archetypal blend of youthful, flair exuberance and dogged, grizzled experience that is the ethos of this side
However, it was clear that we would need all of the enthusiasm and strength that has recently become the hallmark of the development team to meet the challenge of what would be a very well-resourced and combative Ryton squad who inflicted a heavy pre-Christmas defeat upon the gorgeous ones in the last fixture between the sides.
Novos starting line-up:-
Guy Douglas; JP Addison; Cliff Paterson; Miguel Coussins; Callum Hoy; Andy Gardiner; Kim Jong il Pratt II; Deputy Chief Inspector James Desmond; Christian Selkirk; John Marshall; Joe Carr; Tom Wilson senior; Mark Hemmings; Tommy Wilson junior; David Marshall; Damien Foggon; Matt Freeman; Matt MacAuley; Tommy Burford; James Weaver.
And so to the match itself, as both sides completed their warm-ups in bright sunshine on a dry day though with the big pitch heavily sanded after the recent snow and rain. There was a heady sense of anticipation as Ryton kicked off into the Novos 10 where Callum Hoy received and drove back on a strong charge which immediately put the home side onto the front foot, resulting in a scrum with a Novos put-in. Despite giving away a bit of weight, the Novos pack held solid and allowed His Royal Highness to set Jailbird Marshall on a quick break though he was unable to free the predatory Carr who was waiting on the wing. This opening flurry seemed to set the early pattern as Novos began to edge an early period of control but without being able to really piece together any properly fluent handling movements in the face of fierce defence from Ryton.
However the home pack had established an early authority and despite the howls of protest from the balcony, after a beautiful offload from Bad Boy Hoy was judged to be forward, it wasn’t long before Selkirk was able to release a Carr – Marshall combination down the right which forced the visitors to concede a penalty close in. A quick tap ensured that the ball was shipped swiftly through the midfield via the elderly Wilson to feed the bulk of Coussins on the charge and while he was brought down 5 meters short, Des was on hand to pick up and crash over close to the posts for a positive opener from the fantastic Development side. David Marshall notched a simple conversion for 7:0.
However, Ryton are well-known as a battling side and came back strongly, aided and abetted at times by some distinctly modest fringe defence. During this spell Hoy made way, with a back knock, for the extra bulk of the Foggon-monster. Despite maintaining a comfortable set-piece platform, the Vos’ breakdown play was gradually dominated by the physical edge which Ryton brought into their play as they battled to get back into the game and they began to establish more regular territory in the home half. From attacking pressure the lively young Ryton fly-half managed to exploit the lack of a ruck guard and darted between a somewhat isolated pair of Pratt and Foggon and an already injured old dwarf who was unable to close the gap even with zimmer-frame assistance. The conversion was missed as Old Wilson left the field to be replaced by the much sprightlier figure of MacAuley on the wing, with Wilson Junior moving into replace the damaged Old Git in the center.
Wilson senior’s ignominious afternoon continued soon afterwards, when in the face of inertia from the Novos bench and as any aspiring President-elect would (probably not) do, he was called on by the ref to clear a substantial pile of dog-mess from the Ryton 10 meter line, much to the communal mirth of a gleeful balcony! Now having a clean template to express their artistry seemed to revitalise their efforts and they got back on the front foot to match the Ryton effort with John Marshall making a couple of smart breaks as fierce big hits rained in from all sides. Novos discipline and precision did not match their overall effort and drew a series of penalties which allowed the visitors to relive the pressure and after some midfield indecision as Jailbird John took a wrong option, Ryton were sharp enough to use the resulting soft turnover on our 10 to put their big winger into the corner for another unconverted try making the score 7:10 after 32 minutes.
From the restart John Marshall’s comedy kick-off (which probably made a full six inches into the visitors’ half) put pressure back on the home side though a great strike against the head by JP and his propping partners allowed HRH to release MacAuley down the wing where a high tackle on the speedy Irishman was penalised. The quick tap by HRH forced another infringement and saw the ball put this time, firmly and accurately into the corner by the taller Marshall. From the following line-out possession the ball was swung across the pitch for Sale’s finest, Mark Hemmings, to carry strongly through the middle and almost to the try-line before delivering a nice off-load to the supporting Damo who was unstoppable from two meters and crashed through the remaining defence to touch down just outside the right hand post giving David Marshall another simple conversion and to recover the lead for Novos.
The last few minutes of the half took on a surreal effect as, during an injury break in play, the sun glinted sharply off the shining domes of both Des and the bald Ryton prop who were in very convivial conversation together. Immediately afterwards the Dear Leader landed his trademark straight-arm hit in telegraphed slow motion and floored the big winger who, after regaining his feet and dignity, left the field. In truth Pratty was probably lucky not to get a yellow for what was a clumsy rather than malicious challenge and the game soon petered out into half-time.
The interval saw a reshuffle in the backs as John M stood-down to rest his dodgy knee, with MacAuley switching into no 9 and HRH Selkirk moved out one to fly-half. Tommy Burford came onto the wing to complete the backs and Hoy was back in the second row to replace his replacement, Damien Foggon who had departed with a twisted knee just before half-time.
In contrast to the home team’s positive half-time chatter, the early score came from Ryton as their young scrum half (apparently a junior on the Falcons books) broke away past statuesque blind side defence for an 80 meter score. The two young Ryton half-backs began to enjoy the freedom to control the game for a spell and from the restart Novos were saved from conceding further try only be poor finishing and the score remained at 14:15 as the home side began to sort themselves out and take the game back to the visitors.
A nifty steal from Tommy junior, who was starting to get through some heavy work in attack and defence, allowed quick possession into the Ryton 22 and from further quick ball the visionary that is James Desmond floated a long pass into the gap for Selkirk to seize onto and score smartly under the posts.
The conversion by Carr made the score 21:15 and from the restart Ryton drove fiercely into Novos 22 to get themselves back into the match. However the home defence stood firm and another quick turnover saw a narrow side break orchestrated by Selkirk which allowed a smart interchange of passes between Burford and Hoy before the new Fresh-Prince of Novos stretched through a final despairing tackle to score wide out and 26:15 to the handsome beasts.
Again Ryton came strongly at Novos, reverting to a tight driving game which drew a series of free kicks as the home defence had to dig deeply and bravely in several last ditch tackles right on their own goal line. However, cometh the hour cometh the man and the increasingly impressive Matt Freeman, on as a back row replacement, stormed away from another ruck steal on his own line to burst through the defence and release the supporting Selkirk on the charge before he won his own 70 metre kick-chase to touch down wide and in almost the same position as the previous try to make the score 31:15 with the game now into its final quarter.
Carr’s attempted conversion was simply appalling.
From the restart Novos began to provide a stream of good possession which HRH Christian used to good effect by bringing his runners into space and in which both Carr and MacAuley went close to adding further tries. However, against the run of play and highlighting some more complacency in our wide defending, Ryton broke away to score under the posts from long range and to bring the score back to 31:22.
More drama at the restart inexplicably brought Des back from what would have been a strong attacking position after he grabbed a quick kick on the sneaky side and from the resultant scrum Novos realised they had to dig-in to prevent the game slipping back into the balance. At this stage further replacements were needed which didn’t help the continuity any, but saw John Marshall back in the action as a line out salmon from the flank. During this period Matt Freeman and Tommy junior were prominent among several strong tackles delivered by both sides before a final piece of weak defence out wide un-did the previous good work and allowed Ryton to score the softest of run-in trys down the touchline – this being unconverted to leave Novos lead cut back to only 31:27 with four minutes to play.
After Kim Jong il Pratt’s emotional near break down, the troops re-gathered under Des’s orders and quickly won back the restart ball to set position in the Ryton half and to close out the match with several controlled pick and drives which were in some contrast to the loss of focus which had allowed Ryton back into the match.
At the final whistle there was understandable delight in winning what was always going to be a tough game, going to the top of our league and extending the run to six consecutive wins, but the side only really played properly in patches and one or two individuals do need to look very seriously at improving their own defensive effort if they are going to hold on to their places in the squad.
Man of the match was awarded to two try hero HRH Selkirk who narrowly held off impressive performances from Des and Tommy junior.
Anyway, it looks like the youth wing of the squad had yet another epic Saturday night out, even if nobody seems to have been arrested this week. Next Saturday it’s onwards and upwards with the visit of West End in the league where another win will consolidate our position at the top of the league. It’s all to play for so let’s keep it positive, keep it winning and keep it Novos.

Report by Tom Wilson 130 & 3/4s