3s show Gos whos boss

Week 4 of the Glorious 3’s season saw the Gosforth welcomed to the supreme peoples assembly of Sutherland Park. A return to headquarters saw an excited team out early to kick balls in all directions and watch some school boys do a dance. Leader Pratt not impressed by their dance demanded his subjects in for a team talk. Rousing as ever, words of “******* get up for it and errr ******* get up for it” the troops were ready for battle. At this point Supreme Leader Pratt decided to put his name up for burford of day early. Having been warned by the ref that there was 2 mins to kick off Pratt called the team into the changing room. Warned of a penalty at kick off if he wasn’t out in time, he laughed in the ref’s face and continued to lead the team inside.
Arriving for kick off on time (even the Marshall's where there) Novo’s had kick off. John Marshall took kick off and put it deep into Gosforth’s Twenty. Kick off was collected by wing Peniston to put Novo’s straight on the attack. Great hands saw him juggle the ball and give a forward pass to supporting Lee Histed. Scrum Down Gosforth. Great pressure on the scrum allowed Taylor to put pressure on the Gosforth Scrum Half and in a moment of sheer genius Taylor decided to slap the ball to the floor as the ball was passed. Giving away a penalty and receiving a threat of a yellow card. Following this we saw the first line out of the match. Gosforth secured good ball and began to attack through he midfield allowing to make there way up to Novos 22. A kick turnover allowed Novo’s to counter attack and John Marshall swiftly moved the ball out to David and Connor who managed to move the attack back to Gosforth 22. Novo's yet again conceded another penalty allowing the opposition to clear their lines.
Gosforth quickly back on the attack identified a weakness in the Novo’s defence (revolving door Hemmings) and targeted it. Hemmings caught unaware while wondering if he in fact did have a soul, put in a weak challenge that allowed Gosforth in for their first score. Incensed by his stupidity (obviously gingers don’t have souls) had a Joe Hartesque outburst kicking the post. Leading to calls for Head & Shoulders the be included in the medical bag from now on. 7-0 Gosforth. Pressure continued to mount as the team struggled to clear their lines, until a great line break from David & Connor in support, although this was quickly blown up by the ref for no clear reason. Novo’s continued to attack through the forwards only to throw the ball wide. Centre Hemmings on the ball, out to make up for his earlier mistake had 2 men outside against one defender. Using his rugby brain, he decided against the clear try scoring pass and cut inside looking for the nearest man to tackle him. To his disappointment there was no-one able to bring him down and he crossed the line. D Marshall slotted the conversion 7-7.
Coming back strong Gosforth mounted another attack. Strong running lines allowed them to cross for their second score under the posts. 14 - 7 Gosforth. During the build up to the try J Marshall suffered a knock to the head that saw the end of his day. A straight swap saw T Burford fill in at Out Half. Determined to strike straight back Novos forwards began to produce some great ball that allowed the back line to move the ball forward into the opposition half. Novo's now began to display their dominance in the set piece and won their first of many scrums against the head which led to an attack by the forwards carried on by Addison, Pratt and O’Connell (Shaming the great name with Lime green Boots, better suited to a wendy ball pitch). Building on this and continued pressure saw Tenglesen drive over the line. D Marshall again added the extras. 14 - 14. The half finished with a penalty kick from either side 17 - 17.
At half time it was identified that a more structured game was required to break down the opposition, gaining the hard yards through the forwards before spreading it to the backs.
Not an ideal start to the second half as the ball was knocked on straight from kick off, giving Gos great attacking position. Gosforth failed to utilise this and one again the strong Novo’s scrum turned over the ball allowing Burford to clear the lines. Tommy Wilson stealing ball on Gos 10 allowed for Crofty and a new look focused Hemming’s to break away. Vos flung the ball left to find Dan Hipps who drove the ball into the heart Gosforth defence. This allowed for Pratt to break away and score under posts followed by another successful D Marshall conversion. 24 - 17 Novo’s.
Novo’s set piece dominance started to tell with great work from Gardiner stealing and spoiling defence line outs and fantastic work from hooker Addison who continued his run of straight line out throws. This dominance allowed for Burford to spread the ball wide giving Fenwick a run in to score Novo’s second of the half. Conversion missed 29 - 17 Novo;s. Pressure from the restart gave Novos yet another great attacking opportunity. Burford provided Hemmings with space but unfortunately a lose pass killed the move.
Gosforth began to come back into the game but Novo’s soaked up the pressure and were eventually able to steal the ball and the pressure was relieved by winger Peniston. Another great line out allowed the backs to get good ball distributed well again by Burford gave Fenwick space to attack. Drawing the Defender and passing inside to supporting D Marshall gave Novos another score. Converting his own try bringing to score to 36 - 17 Novos. With 10 minutes left novos began to attack only to be prevented by a number of questionable referring calls. Novos Fitness telling winger Fenwick was able to score past a tiring Gosforth back line. Conversion missed 41 - 17 Novos.
Determined not to concede any points in the second half Novos defence continued to be watertight throughout Gosforth pressure in the closing stages. Another great line out allowed Taylor to put the ball out of play(into the ministry car park, no need Justin, no need) to end the match. 2 wins in a row for Novos hoping to continue this form away to Gateshead next.
Post match rumours that Taylor had been leaking intelligence of Burford’s performance to sworn enemy the super 2’s called for punishment. Tengelsen took it upon himself to exact revenge. Seizing his opportunity he fish hooked Taylor and began to pour ale down his throat in an attempt to drown him. Let this be a lesson to all who disobey the glorious leader.

Match report by angry Irishman Justin Taylor