WEST END STORY;

Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls! Novocastrians 3rds proudly present their latest rugby showcase from Saturday past:
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WEST END STORY;
(Written by Z.Weatherhead, Directed I.Pratt, Star studded appearances by J.Bulfin, C.Selkirk and J.W.Marshall)
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Our story begins on a damp Saturday afternoon with the going soft, greasy and sandy. At Novos the gentlemen of the 3s strode out in their bold red, white and black against the shadowy tones of West End. The teams shared as much love for one another on the pitch and the Jets and the Sharks did for each other in the original of this script rip-off, tackles and turnovers were traded either way with neither side able to take a stranglehold initially.
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Alas a breakthrough! Some clever play, quick hands and a darting run brings a score for Novos through Selkirk! Richardson slots a delicious kick and our protagonists take a, albeit expectant, lead.
However, Shakespeare did love a bit of tragedy, and it struck relatively soon after with West End levelling things up, displaying their tactics for the encounter. The men in stripes just couldn't find any kind of true rhythm going forward but plodded on relentlessly showing a decent defensive display. (Enter stage The Left Wing), the forwards looked up from their scrum, was that Joe Ball in the distance travelling at pace? It was. He draws the final man with an Elvis like shake of the hips and then our hero emerges for the ball, the pass is slightly behind him, the crowd gasp...'BULFIN CAN CATCH!' They cried as he tilted the score back in favour of the Vos!
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End of Act 1
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Our second act begins with West End again giving a demonstration of their strategy, but they didn't expect the cunning plan implemented by the Novos pack. 'If we don't engage, we aren't offside'. Enter a new villain- the referees knowledge of obstruction. Although not understanding the rule, it was acknowledged as when the plan was performed a second time (following an in depth teaching session with Mr Pratt) she screeched 'obstruction!' whilst offering nothing following this. After absorbing some good pressure and fighting back with a hearty spirit, a grubber and chase delivers a smashing second for our hero Bulfin! Some relative comfort for Vos.
But the men in black decided enough was enough... and using aforementioned plans produced a recovery try.
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Novos in their half, ball to Bulfin, 'GET US ONSIDE!' Screams Pratt. Ignored. Bulfin kicks with good height, if only direction and distance were of the same quality.
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The West didn't see the return of John '9 Fingers' Marshall coming either, with a stunning line break to revive the points cushion. Footwork, finesse, fearless- what a comeback.
Guess who went forwards only again... minutes later West Ends final flourish produces another try. This was to be their last.
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David Marshall on... David Marshall off.
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With the curtain close drawing near the Novos backs were still up for it, and despite the referee insisting scrums were her new favourite things just because she could, a backs break brings us the final act of valour from our hero Bulfin. A hat trick. Maybe more importantly- a jug! Levelling the top try scorers list.
Very little drama in the close of proceedings, Glen swung for someone sort of, but we're getting used to that in these matinees.
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End of Act 2
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In summary, all's well that ends well. Good in places, slow and poorly developed play throughout but the job was done.
A man once said 'the course of true love never did run smooth' and how true that is for the performance past.
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I end this review here 5/10.
(Events may not be in chronological order)
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Good night, good night! parting is such sweet sorrow, That I shall say good night till it be morrow.